When turtles cry, butterflies swarm. From the sea turtle to the yellow-spotted river turtle of the Amazon rain forest, turtles shed tears. Their tears are not of sadness or joy but tears of cleansing and strength. While the biological reason turtles cry is to remove excess salt from their body, their tears are used by butterflies for sustenance. Butterflies drink the tears of turtles. The tears provide salt in sodium scarce regions where butterflies live. Nature has a beautiful way of weaving compassion into the fabric of life and we could learn a lesson or two from such beauty.
When we see another suffering, we should swarm to help. Helping others helps strengthen your community and even yourself in ways that science is just revealing. In terms of community building, Milena Tsvetkova and Michael Macy concluded in “The Science of Paying It Forward” that “the next time you stop to help a stranger, you may be helping not only this one particular individual but potentially many others downstream…We conclude that observing an act of kindness is likely to play an important role in setting a cascade of generosity in motion.” Research by scholars such as Shawn Achor, Jonathan Haidt, Dacher Keltner and Paul Zak shows that when we help others we release hormones such as oxytocin that increase our own happiness while decreasing stress and anxiety.
A dear friend of mine with whom I work closely with, Scarlett Lewis, has turned her tears for her youngest son, Jesse, into strength for tens of thousands of people. Instead of cocooning herself from the world after she lost her 6 year old Jesse in the Sandy Hook tragedy, Scarlett initiated and is leading a movement to weave “nurturing, healing and love” into schools and businesses across the country (her foundation of which I am a member of the board of directors is called the Jesse Lewis Choose Love Foundation). From school children in Hawaii to prisoners in Massachusetts and teachers in Connecticut, I’ve watched Scarlett provide hope to people who had fallen into the compassion and empathy gaps of our world. Her struggle through loss has nourished resiliency in others. Her tears are symbols of strength to many who have become the butterflies of her life’s work.
We’ve all known about butterfly kisses and their symbolism for tender love, but turtle tears (new to many of us) are symbols of strength when sadness appears and resiliency seems scarce. Learning about the butterfly’s dependence upon the tears of a turtle leads me to wonder: would there be any butterfly kisses without turtle tears? Our tears in life can always be turned into streams of strength and beauty if we choose to follow the turtle.
Shawn Achor, The Happiness Advantage (New York: Crown Business, 2010).
Jonathan Haidt, The Happiness Hypothesis (New York: Basic Books, 2006).
Dacher Keltner, Jason Marsh and Jeremy Adam Smith (eds.), The Compassionate Instinct (New York: W.W. Norton & Company, Inc., 2010).
Douglas Main, “Must-See: Amazonian Butterflies Drink Turtle Tears,” LiveScience (September 11, 2013).
Milena Tsvetkova and Michael Macy, “The Science of Paying It Forward,” The New York Times (March 14, 2014).
Paul Zak, The Moral Molecule: How Trust Works (New York: Penguin Group Inc., 2012).
Chris is Professor of Political Science at Western Connecticut State University, a Fulbright Scholar, Director of the Kathwari Honors Program, and founding Director of the Center for Compassion, Creativity & Innovation. He is also the author of "The Compassionate Achiever: How Helping Others Fuels Success" (HarperOne, 2017).
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